The childhood roots of anxiety
Anxiety can be caused by a number of factors but often has it’s roots in childhood experiences.
We may have learned anxious patterns from our parents or caregivers or we may have become anxious as a result of difficult experiences. Broadly speaking anxiety is a way our minds and bodies cope with unbearable stress. It cuts us off from authentic feelings and the physiological symptoms of tension, feeling on edge and shaky tend to predominate.
Through these experiences we learn that the world doesn’t feel safe and as adults this may create an underlying feeling of anxiety that doesn’t seem to have a cause. The negative experiences we have endured as children cause a shutdown of our natural and authentic feelings and are replaced with chronic feelings of stress.
The part of ourselves that doesn’t feel safe then continues to express its fears and can be easily triggered by current life situations. Feelings of anxiety can then arise in all sorts of situations that on the face of it don’t seem problematic. We can become frustrated and confused when this is the case, shutting down further and hardening the anxious pattern.
AS this shutting down progresses we develop avoidant behaviour whereby we stop doing the things that we feel are creating our bringing on the anxiety. We may stop engaging in relationships, going to social situations or even avoid going outside. In reality the situations are not creating the anxiety but triggering old feelings that already exist within us. When we realise this we are better placed to understand and work through the old feelings rather than avoiding situations in our lives. Avoiding certain things to try to control the anxiety is helpful to a point but eventually this way of coping creates increased fear and our world gets smaller and smaller.
The way to truly work with anxious patterns so that we can change them in a meaningful way is to explore the roots of how they cam to be there in the first place, This is a journey of returning to the past experiences that have caused this disruption to our feelings so that this disruption can be understood and worked through. Without working through the original cause we will most likely continue to act out the anxious patterns and look for ways to soothe the anxiety that may not be helpful to our overall wellbeing.
Taking this step can be daunting but if we are seeking the true freedom to be ourselves it is definitely a journey worth taking.
